Friday, February 11, 2011

Public Fellatio with a View

Oh Seattle, you lucky city placed in the most beautiful and mild part of the country. You give guys like me the opportunity to buy a sweet condo with an amazing view located 2 blocks from the oldest part of the city, right across the street from the brand new 911 call center, and a stone skip away from the wonders of Chinatown. About 65 days a year I can wake up see boats out on elliott bay and the beautiful Olympic Whitecaps. At night, I can watch the sunset in awe. As much as I bitch about this place, I will never take that for granted.

Around 95 days a year (3 to date in 2011) I have some more interesting, disturbing, and down right fucked up views. I get about a 180 degrees of South Downtown. To the right is the bay, then its the stadiums, on over to Beacon Hill, and a little of I5. Not too bad right? Im on the top floor and if you look straight out, I have to admit the view is pretty perfect. Its when you step closer to the sliding glass door and take a look down.

Again, across the street - brand new 911 call center that is supposedly some kind of emergency bunker for the mayor. Thats one corner. To the left - a parking lot that is booming during the day and a desert at night. Right below me - another empty lot and up to the left - another. Yeah maybe I am an idiot to buy this place thinking those lots would be high rises, cafes and grocery stores by now. Then again it was 4 years ago.

Today, a Friday, around 4 PM (daylight and "Seattle rush hour") I take a quick look out and I see some dude laying on the small strip of grass between the lots. People are walking down the hill towards china town, others are picking up their cars from the lots, and a few kids are practicing kickflips in the street. I look again and see some middle aged white lady sitting behind the tree next to him. At first I thought she was pulling a crack pipe out of her sock but she was just taking her shoes off. Then her pants, but only one leg. I blink and the next thing I see is some chunky, nasty, pale white ass jiggling. She is pretty much riding the dude. He's is laying back with his hands in the air. I see a neighbor walk past and do a double take, I went back to grab my phone to record, and the skater kids just saw the action.

She must have saw the kids with the skateboards with their cell phones out and she got off of him and before I could get back - her pants were back on. He didn't care. Next thing you know all I can see is the silhouette of her head bobbing up and down. Dude must have been like "I don't care if those kids are watching, get the job done." and she did. The kids think the guy doesn't see them but he does. He eventually waves and they wave back. They get up from behind the cars and walk away. I didn't stay to see if she ever really did finish the job. Now that I think about it. I was standing on my balcony with my phone trying to record the madness. Maybe he was waving at me. The video came out crappy but I took a screenshot so you can get a good visual. Check out the dude in the red. He went to his car, almost got in, got out and stared for a few seconds, and then left. I have footage from the previous one as well. Not sure if I want to send to KIRO or one of those guys, or maybe even the mayor. Who is the mayor of this town anyway? I need to talk to that guy