See Wang Stand. Hear Wang Talk

Hey - If you been reading this blog, you should know the Wangster by now.

Click to listen to a couple voice messages. Translations will be up soon.

MID at the Union Market

I was in the Union Market (5th and Jackson) yesterday and saw the most amazing product. Its a Durag designed after the cover of Men in Black. All I can say is take a really good look at the picture above.

"High Class/Excellent Quality"

"Comfortably Breathable"

and the best one....

"Made for the People with Style"

And even more amazing, the guy in front of me bought one, put it on in the store, then asked for a red bandana (which they sell there as well). Check out the pic to the right. I had some idiot try it on. Looks pretty good on him.

I bought 1 for each of my brothers so they can represent in the streets of Jersey.

Union Market

I posted this on YELP a few months ago. Its a background to what Im about to post..... 

Its never a dull moment at the Union Market. If you go there anytime before 9 AM, you will get the remarkable aroma of deep fried everything. From chicken wings to eggrolls to taquitos and burritos.... they all go in the same fryer and I swear there is no fan back there. None the less, by 2 PM most of those goodies are bought up. I guess they go good with the 2 dollar tallboys. 

There is always one of the friendly neighbors out front asking for change and you will occasionally see full families in there hanging out after 10 PM....its like a trip to the mall. I bring leftover dinner a few times a week. 

One time, I brought a baked salmon pesto with rice and greens. I offered it to a lady who said she was hungry. She took a look and said she does not eat salmon and handed it back to me. I did not want to get rejected again so I left it on a bench thinking someone would eat it. I came back out to find a swarm of seagulls rummaging through the bag and spreading salmon all over 5th and Jackson.

Back to the Union Market...the owner and guys behind the counter are cool and dont take any shit. You can get basically anything you want from eggs to single cigarettes.... I would stay away from the corn dogs.

The best part is someone also wrote a review. See it here

Pedro - Naked Drunk Guy

I better write this before I forget. I mean its been over 2 years. Its still kinda fresh in my head which makes me scared I wont forget the other things that have happened.

I guess I was living in my place for a few months when I met Pedro. It was about 11 PM on a Saturday night and I had no food in the fridge. I decided to walk down to Jimmy Johns in Pioneer square for a quick sandwich. Honestly, Im still surprised I can get any type of food in Seattle after 9 PM, yet alone a hoagie. By the way, Seattle sucks for hoagies. Thats a whole new topic I hope to write about soon. I walk down avoiding crackheads and drunk idiots and grab a BLT with extra cheese. You need to order cheese on a BLT! I was eating the last bite as I walked up to the front door. I live in a "secure" building where residents are supposed to buzz guests in or at least use a code to open the door. I let myself in and look up.

There stands this latino guy in his 30s wearing nothing but sneakers, socks, and well thats about it. He is holding two tiny pieces of fabric - one in the front and the other in the back. He is standing by the elevator when he sees me. He kind of cracks a smile and jumps on 1 of the 2 elevators. OK, Im freaked out and a little unsure of what to do. So, I just chill. About a minute later, he gets off the first elevator and tried to jump in the other. These elevators go to the same floor so there would be no reason to switch. At that point, Im pissed. Fuck this guy. I say "Hey, where the hell are you going?" He gets off and is wacked out of his mind. He says he's going to his friends place. I say "These elevators go to the same fucking place and if you didnt know what floor the first time, you dont now... so get the fuck off!"

Which he does. The guy is way drunk. Im asking him who he is visiting and he is just smiling and kinda flirting with me which was weird but kinda flattering. I tell him hes gotta leave. He says no. I then proceed to push his ass out the front door trying my best to not see or touch anything. I get him to the door and he is fighting to stay in. I finally throw him out by his neck and pull the door shut. I'm about to go upstairs and forget about the whole thing. Then, of course, I feel bad.

During the scuffle, he was telling me he went to the Mariners game and all he remembers is being at Pyramid brewery. He had a nice watch on with new sneakers and a fresh haircut. He was not homeless or a crackhead. Well, maybe a crackhead but not a street person. The other thing that was really creepy is he had scratches all over his neck and back. The pieces of fabric turned out to be from his boxers which is even worse. Anyway, I look at the dude standing out front and naked for the most part. He had a rough night already. Maybe a night in jail would have helped cause thats where he would have ended up if I left him.

I grab some towels from the community bathroom and hand em out the door and tell him to wait. I go upstairs and find my oldest, shittiest jeans and a t-shirt. Yep, I let the fool wear my stuff. I let him in to change and tell him he has to go back outside but I will try to find his friends. First, I interrogate Pedro repeatedly asking him his name, his friends name, where we works, etc. I didnt think he was lying to me so I decide to help. He gives me some numbers to call and after about 6 I end up on the phone with his dad in California. He confirms everything Pedro said including where he is a bar tender (at the time it was one of my favorite happy hour spots) By the way, I made him promise me free food. Im feeling better about being outside alone with him. Its after 12 at this point.

Just then, my neighbor comes out of the garage with a bat and asked if I saw some drunk dude in the building. I said "yeah, this guy. I found him half naked and now hes wearing my clothes." My neighbor freaks out and says some guy was trying to break into cars. He went down to check on his and found a pair of jeans, tshirt, cell phone and wallet next to his car. It was Pedro's. The neighbor is going crazy. He wants to beat him with the bat and swears Pedro was trying to break in. Either way, he wants to call the cops. I try to tell him I just spoke to his father and he lost his friends. Doesnt matter, neighbor wants to call the cops which he does.

I tell Pedro he better leave or hes gonna be arrested. He smiles again and gives me that weird creepy look. He doesnt want to leave. OK, last chance.. last chance I keep telling him. Well, 2 hours later the cop shows up. Pedro and my neighbor are still out front. 2 hours later! I live across from the new 911 call center in Seattle and it took 2 hours for the cops to come. Anyway, the cop comes, sees that he is drunk and doesnt care. I do tell the officer that I spoke with his dad and everything seemed to check out. Pedro is sobering up and remembers where he parked. The cop agrees to drive him back to his car. I was happy, my neighbor was pissed.

I go upstairs and call the father back who is obviously concerned at this point. I let him know that I gave his son clothes, he was sobering up, and the cop was driving him back to his car. The next day I get a call from a guy and he says "Hello, this is Pedro. Ummm......My dad told me to call and say.... thanks." He did not remember anything.

To this day I have no clue what happened that night but I was creeped out. I figured he met some guy at the baseball game and ended up back in my building. His boxers looked like they were shredded and the scratches made me assume he was attacked - maybe butt raped. Maybe he was hiding in the garage. Maybe he liked it. Im grossed out just thinking about it and cant look at certain neighbors the same.

I never did go back for the free happy hour food. Actually, Ive never been back there at all. Maybe I will stop in one day to see if he remembers me and if I can get my jeans back. Fucking Pedro.